Lately, I’ve been feeling overwhelmed. While I'm immensely grateful for the work I have, the mental burden of a never-ending to-do list was becoming unbearable. Everytime I would sit down, I would let out a big sigh and that rest wouldn’t last long before I had to get up and do something—often to meet self-imposed deadlines like writing or pitching for more work. As a result, my creativity was dwindling, and I felt my writing began to resemble an ornament on a shelf rather than the true artistic expression I strive for.
As the guilt rose, my healthy habits declined—I ordered more takeaways and did less breathwork or meditation. This only exacerbated the problem. Thankfully, I no longer drink, as that would have been another crutch for me. Instead, I tried to elevate my productivity by drinking more coffee and adding extra lion’s mane for its potential cognitive-enhancing effects (1). However, the extra caffeine significantly added to my overwhelm, causing energy spikes and dips that led to wanting naps straight after breakfast, and not being able to concentrate on tasks.As a consequence, my confidence in my writing waned, and I became very self-critical, losing the spark and turning my posts from something I wanted to do into something I felt I had to do.
Rather than plough on, as I usually would, I made a drastic decision to have a weekend free from solid food, caffeine, and my phone. I’m not sure when I last went a whole day without my phone—it’s usually the first thing I reach for upon waking (I know it’s bad), accompanied by my morning coffee while casually browsing Instagram or doing some life admin.
The Juice Cleanse
With my background in running wellness retreats, I'm an advocate of juice cleanses—not for detoxification, as I believe in a healthy diet and supplying the liver with the nutrients needed for the liver to do its job effectively. What I find beneficial about juice cleanses is the pause they enforce, a moment often overlooked in discussions about fasting. When you stop putting things in your mouth, you confront your feelings rather than numb them. This can be challenging, especially if you are good at sweeping emotions under the carpet, or you're wired to seek dopamine through reward-based activities.
During the cleanse, I noticed a clarity of mind that I hadn't felt in a long time. My senses seemed sharper, and my thoughts were more focused. The absence of solid food forced me to confront my emotional hunger, which was far more significant than my physical hunger. It was a humbling experience that reminded me of the importance of mindful eating, living and resting.
Caffeine
The thought of giving up caffeine was harder than the reality. The voice in my head would insist, “But you will be tired,” whenever I considered it. While coffee has documented health benefits (2), my intuition told me it was contributing to my energy slumps throughout the day. The additional adrenaline and cortisol weren't helping either. Giving up caffeine was tough—not only did I battle with my ego, but I also felt drained, albeit briefly. Decaffeinated coffee doesn't have the same bite, and I've noticed I no longer gravitate towards the coffee machine upon waking - perhaps because i’m actually awake and clear-headed.
In the absence of caffeine, my energy levels became more stable. The initial withdrawal was challenging, with headaches and a sense of lethargy, but after a few days, I felt a more natural, sustained energy. This allowed me to better tune in to my body's natural rhythms and needs, rather than relying on external stimulants.
Phone
This was by far the most interesting aspect. I missed the connectivity we're all used to now. Going without my phone induced feelings of boredom, a luxury these days in a world full of technology. I noticed my fear of leaving the house without my phone and our reliance on technology—even to the point where I couldn’t unlock my bike, which left me frustrated. I also noticed my anger when people walked towards me while using their phones, narrowly missing my path. Walking through the park on a sunny day and seeing everyone on their phones, even in restaurants, made me wonder if there will be warnings on phones in the future, similar to cigarettes.
This digital detox made me acutely aware of how much time I spent on my phone and how it affected my interactions with the world. Without it, I found myself more present and engaged in my surroundings. I rediscovered simple joys like reading a book, taking a walk, or having an uninterrupted conversation. If anything, going without my phone made me more conscious of mindless scrolling, encouraging me to put my phone down when it's time to focus on the moment.
The circuit breaker allowed me to pause and realise that I rush through tasks without actually enjoying the process. Particularly now, as I am in the midst of writing another book, it's imperative that it’s not just a task to complete but a piece of me that I can give to the world, hoping it stands out as more than an ornament on the shelf.
Conclusion
The three-day cleanse and digital detox were transformative. I learned that sometimes, stepping back and taking a break from our usual routines can offer profound insights and rejuvenation. It reminded me of the importance of slowing down and being present. This experience has inspired me to integrate these pauses more regularly into my life, ensuring that I maintain my creativity and well-being. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, I highly recommend giving yourself the gift of a break—it might be just what you need to reconnect with yourself and reignite your passion.
Docherty, S., Doughty, F. L., & Smith, E. F. (2023). The Acute and Chronic Effects of Lion’s Mane Mushroom Supplementation on Cognitive Function, Stress and Mood in Young Adults: A Double-Blind, Parallel Groups, Pilot Study. Nutrients, 15(22), 4842.
Gökcen, B. B., & Şanlier, N. (2019). Coffee consumption and disease correlations. Critical reviews in food science and nutrition, 59(2), 336-348.