I had some excellent news this week: I graduated from my Master's programme with distinction. This achievement marks over two years of dedicated effort, much of it behind the scenes, as I aimed to project the calm and composed demeanour of a swan gliding down a river, despite the chaos beneath the surface.
At the core of my Master's thesis is a deeply personal exploration, charting a unique course that intertwines the transformative lessons of psychedelics with my professional development in health and nutrition. Far from just shedding light on the insights from psychedelic experiences or facilitating my own healing, it has paved a new path, offering a renewed understanding of holistic health and reshaping my approach as a nutritionist and mindset coach.
Employing a first-person action research methodology, I explored the interconnectedness of mental, emotional, and physical well-being, advocating for an approach where the depth of personal experiences complements traditional evidence-based practices. This stance doesn't diminish the value of positivist science but rather recognises the limitations of relying solely on randomised controlled trials for understanding complex human experiences.
This journey has underscored a crucial realisation: becoming a more effective practitioner requires confronting and working through one's own traumas. For me, this meant recognising and addressing the depth of my own unresolved issues, which had become so normalised that they were almost invisible to me, leading to a life that felt increasingly inauthentic and exhausting.
Embracing Pride
It has been a journey filled with internal struggle to navigate the pride in my accomplishments. I noticed my reluctance to tell anyone my achievement and easily observed the self-criticism hooks. I was always taught to view self-praise with suspicion and reminded that "children should be seen and not heard." The process of acknowledging my own success has often felt like traversing a minefield of guilt and self-doubt. This journey towards accepting and expressing pride in my work has been a challenging pill to swallow, confronting deeply ingrained beliefs that equated self-recognition with boasting and vanity.
Additionally, a deep-seated fear of inadequacy fuels the constant watchfulness for feedback, adding another layer of complexity. This sensitivity can be traced back to my upbringing and the often excessively politicised nature of the nutrition industry, where being openly proud is overshadowed by the anticipation of critique. It's as if I'm perpetually armed with a cache of defensive responses, bracing for the possibility of criticism rather than fully embracing the moment and acknowledging my accomplishments.
I've started to reshape my perception of pride, transitioning from viewing it as a source of unease to recognising it as a symbol of self-recognition and a testament to my evolving path. Initially, this shift felt somewhat mechanical, as if I were moving through the motions without fully internalising the change. However, this transformation involves learning to embrace proud vulnerability, a process of openly acknowledging and celebrating my achievements without succumbing to the fear of seeming arrogant or failing to meet external expectations. Despite the initial discomfort and the forced nature of these steps, this move towards transparency has not only been freeing but has also enriched my relationships, creating an environment where genuine self-expression and growth are encouraged. By adopting this stance, even through its initially mechanical feel, I've discovered a newfound strength, confidently owning my successes while staying receptive to the invaluable insights each experience brings.
My thesis offers a glimpse into the potential of psychedelics to not only heal but to profoundly transform both the practitioner and practice for those who are interested in the intersection of psychedelics and holistic health. This journey, detailed in my Master's thesis, serves as a testament to the power of psychedelics in forging a path towards a more integrated, empathetic, and holistic approach to health and wellbeing. If youโre interested in reading my thesis, you can view it here.
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WOW, so impressive-You Rock!!
Congratulations. Youโve worked so hard and itโs been amazing to witness you unfold into the person you are today. Iโm so proud of you โค๏ธ๐๐ฝ